Posts Tagged ‘family’

Happy 33rd Birthday Natalie

Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

Sometimes I wonder what is would be like when I get to Heaven. Will my sister, cousin and grandparents all be there to welcome me? Will they be proud of the life I have lived?

Today is my sister’s birthday. She would have been 33 today. She died in a drunk driving accident when she was 18. She was out partying with some friends on a Friday night. Sometime in the wee hours of the night, we left with a friend and some guy named Jeremy. My understand Jeremy told my sister and her friend that he hadn’t drunk much and was safe to drive her friend home and my sister back to where she left our car (Her and I shared a car). They were able to drop off my sister’s friend and on their way back to the car, Jeremy was driving like 70 mph in a 35 mph zone. There was a curve in the road that he didn’t make. Jeremy crashed the car into a tree. My sister was killed instantly on impact. He was thrown through the windshield window and survived the crash.

That morning that I found out had to be the worst day of my life. My dad came up to my brother and my room to tell us. He woke us up around 6 in the morning with the news. He said, “Boys get up, Natalie was in a wreck and is died”. Those words still haunt me to this day.  Just thinking about it almost brings me back to that day and the emotions I had.

Yesterday I went and got my haircut. I get my haircut by my sister’s old best friend. She sees Jeremy every now and then. She told me when I was getting my haircut that he is now married to a girl that my sister graduated with. I told her “I hope they are happy together”. She told me, “Not me, I hope they have a rotten life together”. Honestly, the way I look at it is if he isn’t sorry for what he had done and doesn’t change the way he lives his life, he has to answer to God for it all. Life on earth is short compared to the time we have when we die and go to Heaven, Hell, or Purgatory. I do believe strongly in my heart that God will make him answer for ALL his actions and God know if he is sorry for what he has done. If you are wondering, according to my sister’s old best friend, she still sees Jeremy out in the local bars drinking and getting into his car drunk and driving away. She has called the police on him several times for doing so. So honestly, I do not really feel that he is truly sorry for what he did to my sister and our family. All I know is God will make him answer for ALL he has done and with God, there is no lying, there is no telling Him you are sorry when you are not, there is acting like you want to be forgiving one day and the next going out and doing the same wrong thing over again.

I would like to take this time to remind everyone that drunk driving kills.
I have lost a sister, an uncle and a friend to it. All three were killed at separate times. So please, if you do go out and drink, make sure you have a DD and please make sure that DD is a responsible person.  Do not be afraid to call someone if you need a ride or take a cab home. It is much better to do that then have your family and friend go through an ordeal like the ones I have had to experience.

A birthday wish

Monday, July 27th, 2009

Today is my birthday.

The weeks leading up to this day is allows filled with the same question year after year from friends and family members. What do I want this year as a present for my birthday? Most years I tell them the same thing. I do not really need anything. Usually this leads to them getting a little upset with me for not giving them any ideas. Honestly, I don’t think it would really bother me now if I did not receive a single gift from anyone for my birthday other than just being able to spend time with my friends and family. Maybe it is because as I grow older, but it just seems like the things I valued have been changing. Muhammad Ali said  “The man who views the world at fifty the same as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life.”  I am nowhere near being fifty, but I do think the things I value in life have and will continue to change. Life is too short to be wasting even one year of one’s life.

However, this year I would like to wish for something. This is more of a wish that I think only God can fulfill. I will be calling this gentleman about designing a website for his business today. I would really like to get this design job. The reason I want to get this design job is not for the money, even though I could use it. The reason I want this so badly is that the site would be a challenge for me to create. If I am capable of designing this website, it would be a huge boost in myself confidence.

I talked to this gentleman on Friday (July 24th) and he explained to me what he was looking for. For the rest of that day and the following day, I was racking my brain on how I would be able to do what he wanted me design for him. I also had doubts about my ability to do this. Is this something over my head? Am I ready for such a project? My self-doubts just kept coming and coming.

Sunday morning (July 26th) I woke up at 7 am for some crazy reason. All of a sudden it came to me on how I could do this web design project. It would have to be a combination of the program I wrote for work as well as a project I had to do to graduate from Ferris State University.

Therefore, this year, I am asking God to grant me this one wish; to receive the green light from this gentleman to design a website for his business. I think hearing him say I got the job would be the best birthday present I have received in a very long time.  I believe it would be such a huge boost to my self-confidence, which if you have read some of my previous posting you would know it is not as high as it should be. I do feel that once my confidence is at the level it should be, I can do greater things for this world than I am doing now.

The question to end this posting is this: What have you done in the past to increase your confidence?  Let others and myself know what you have done to boost your confidence level in hopes that it will help one person see a raise in theirs.